Pasta Doesn’t Make You Fat, Says Greatest Study Ever

The researchers were Italian, so you know it’s legit.

For anyone whose favorite party drug is pasta, we’re about to make your day. A new study confirms that a noodle-heavy diet doesn’t make you fat — in fact, it’s just the opposite. Italian researchers (aka the world’s most qualified pasta scientists) studied the eating habits of 23,000 people and found no correlation between pasta and higher body mass index (BMI). Oh, but it gets better. The study showed pasta consumption is actually linked to smaller waist sizes and lower waist-hip ratios (!!!).

The report claimed that pasta eaters were more likely to follow the Mediterranean diet, which encourages plenty of fruits, vegetables, healthy fats and whole grains. That means banning pasta from your life is not only masochistic but fundamentally backward if you want to follow a healthy, balanced diet. Of course, researchers emphasize that this is only true when pasta is “consumed in moderation.” Plus, a traditional serving of pasta in Italy is way smaller than the small trough I usually consume. Still, this is amazing news for both carb enthusiasts and anyone who owns stock in Olive Garden. Now can Mexican researchers green-light my burrito-heavy diet?