The 5 Types Of Jerks You Meet In The Airport Security Line

Since TSA lines have been hell on earth recently (and always, TBH),  there are only a handful of solutions that can solve this long-line crisis.

I'd consider myself a frequent flyer who has mastered the art of moving quickly through TSA checkpoints (my record is 3 minutes, if you were wondering). Each time I go through airport security, I make my life (and the TSA agent's life) a little easier by paying close attention to what's going on around me and by following the rules. Simple stuff. 

Rather than blaming the TSA officers for moving too slow, we can take the speed of the lines into our own hands by expediting the processes a little bit. 

Whether you're traveling across the country or across the world, you'll run into at least one of these people whenever you're going through the TSA checkpoint. 

This means that any container containing a liquid has to be three fluid ounces or less. These containers must be able to fit into one zip-closing bag and this bad must be able to fit into one travel bin per person. 

For some reason, some people "forget" they have large, hair spray cans in their bags. Before going to the airport, make sure you check to see if what's in your carry-on luggage fits this 3-1-1 rule. If not, leave it at home. 

You spot them from what seems like a mile away: a family of six moves through the TSA line, all wearing the same Mickey Mouse themed shirt with the signature Disney font spelling out the words "Anderson Family Vacation." 

To make sure this part goes smoothly for your family, think about clothes that are easily removable to make this process easier for the whole family. Kids under the age of 12 do not need to remove shoes and light jackets, but you do. 

Try placing your jacket into your carry-on bag before you get into the line and even though it's a fashion faux pas, try wearing Crocs. 

You know the guy: the one dressed like he just came out of a business meeting and took an UberBlack to the airport. He means business and wants everyone to know it as loudly takes a business call while in line. 

Instead of having a full-on business meeting in the TSA line, try answering the phone and letting the caller know that you're unable to talk for the next five minutes. I promise you, that call can wait just a few minutes so you're not holding up the line.

There's a newly-married couple at the airport. It's not like you were a guest witnessing the ceremony, but you just know that they've recently tied the knot by the unbearable amount of PDA in line. As much as you want to be happy for the couple, you can't because it's just that obnoxious.

With wedding season in full swing, I beg of you, newly weds: PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SAVE THE LOVING FOR THE ACTUAL HONEYMOON, NOT THE AIRPORT. 

Uh oh... Looks like the lines were longer than they were expecting and they're about to miss their flight. You don't care if they overslept or if they were stuck in traffic, but it doesn't matter — this person will tell you their sob story to try to talk their way to the front of the line. 

Here's a tip to not be that person: arrive at the airport about two hours before your flight's scheduled departure time. 

In busier airports, it may make sense to leave about three hours before your flight time. This will help you not become a nervous wreck while waiting in long lines.