The 'Jerk Shirt' Is A Real Thing You Can Buy, And You Should Be Outraged
The "Jerk Shirt" is exactly what it sounds like. 👕 ? 🍆 💦
Do you think public masturbation is funny?
Does public exposure make you want to roll on the floor laughing? Does the predatory sexual glare of a man make you want to bust a gut, joshingly pat him on the shoulder and say, "Oh, you!"?
What, you don't think those things are funny? Well, then you probably won't think the Jerk Shirt is very funny, either. Because it's just an abomination and yet another reason why men are seen as predators. Can women get a fucking break?
The Jerk Shirt is probably pretty close to what you think it is.
It's a shirt created with a prosthetic arm and "splash guard" so that its users can masturbate in public without getting caught. Are you laughing yet?
In case you're wondering, yes, I realize the product is a joke.
The "patent-pending" Jerk Shirt is being made by CamSoda, a pornography webcam site (don't google it at work). It's clearly intended as a novelty/joke product—not a terribly funny one, obviously—and that's fine. It's okay to make jokes about masturbation. It's okay to make jokes that aren't that funny. But to encourage people to masturbate in public? That's fucked up on so many levels.
I literally can't scream "this is just another piece of evidence for why we live in rape culture" at my computer any harder right now.
And to clear up any further confusion, you can actually get a Jerk Shirt, and that's what's so fucked up about it.
There's nothing wrong with enjoying a little pornography, and it's certainly completely natural to masturbate. But by actually making this "joke product" available to men everywhere for marketing means is repulsive and CamSoda is just taking their joke too far.
The Jerk Shirt is literally encouraging #AllMen to masturbate in public. That already happens, you fools! Guys masturbate in public very regularly! It's a fucking crime for a reason. Do you think women are laughing on the subway as men beat off to them while they're just trying to get home from work?
The product will no doubt get lots of press for your site (whoa, I'm having a meta moment), but is it really worth it to throw the concerns of victimized women under the bus? Just try explaining the product to your mothers, sisters and daughters.
I think it's a safe bet to assume it won't be long until someone gets arrested for trying to actually use one of these in public.
The excuse will probably be as stupid as you think it is, too.
Masturbator: "But the YouTube video said I could use it anywhere!"
Police officer: "You're a fucking idiot."