I Went to the NFL Draft & It Was Enough Emotional Turmoil to Last a Lifetime

The NFL Draft is pretty much the NFL's equivalent to Broadway's Tony Nominations — it gets fans pumped about the upcoming season and helps them make predictions about their favorite team's performance. But what's it like attending the televised three-day event?

As a casual football fan, I get about two or three emails a day about what's happening around the NFL, even if it's during the offseason. During a normal day of checking my email, I saw a subject line that stood out to me: "Your Chance to Attend the 2016 NFL Draft!" Like any raffle I enter, I forgot about it, thinking I wouldn't be chosen to attend such a highly-anticipated event. 

A few days later, I received an email letting me know that I had tickets to the NFL Draft and I needed to claim them before someone else did. I claimed my tickets as soon as possible and talked nonstop for an entire week about how excited I was to be able to attend what's essentially a kick off to the football season. 

I didn't, however, expect it to put me through an emotional rollercoaster for three and a half hours.

I arrived at the check-in gate knowing I was in for a long evening. I'm pretty optimistic, but something told me this event wasn't going to be a breeze to get in to.

I was right. After waiting in line for an hour and a half, I finally arrived at the entrance to the Auditorium Theatre, where the Draft ceremony was held. 

Security was tighter than the vagina of a Catholic school girl. One security guard forced me to throw my umbrella away. Another made me dump the full contents of my purse into a clear plastic bag after I insisted that I was diabetic (true) and needed the insulin and glucose monitor inside. 

It was embarrassing. To have to dump all of my medical supplies into a bag in front of everyone made me feel uncomfortable. What was extra perplexing was watching men with NFL backpacks that were larger than my purse walk through the security scanners with no problem. 

Once I dumped everything in the bag, I was obliged to place my now-empty purse in a SEPARATE plastic bag. I moved through the scanner and entered the draft, umbrella-less, and now with TWO bags instead of just one. 

Moral of this story: the security at the NFL Draft is worse than TSA at any airport.

Once I finally got past security, I finally became as excited as I was when I first found out I had tickets to the event. There were girls handing out backpacks to everyone entering the venue (lol). 

Ushers instructed us to go up the stairs to the area where priority ticket holders (like myself) would be held. I walked up six flights of stairs to the nosebleed seats of the theatre. But hey, at least I was there, right??

As I took my seat, I decided to take a peak into the backpack (my third bag, but who's counting) handed to me at the entrance. To my surprise, there were Skittles, bags of chips and memorabilia for the Draft including a trading cards and a little radio that played ESPN. 

Hooray!

FUN FACT: I know nothing about the Draft process.

I sat next to this Cowboys fan for two reasons: I am a Cowboys fan myself (sue me) and I have no idea how this whole Draft thing works. I only know that it's like picking teams at recess, but with college players. Since I don't usually watch college ball, I was lost.

I was hoping that if I had any questions, he could be my football savior and answer any question that pops into my mind. 

Each time a player's name was about to get announced, a man walked to the microphone on stage and everyone booed at him. Who was this man? Why was he hated so much? I found out from the guy next to me that he was the NFL Commissioner, Roger Goodell. 

Poor, Roger. You probably didn't hear my supportive cheers underneath the sounds of grown, drunk men screaming at you. 

Let me tell you: THE NFL DRAFT IS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE ON TV!

On television, the Draft is filled with fun visuals of players in waiting areas and commentary from sports reporters. In person, it's sitting in a large room with a bunch of anxious sports fans just listening to Baha Men's "Who Let the Dogs Out" and waiting for the next team to make their Draft pick. No one sang "Who Let The Dogs Out" with me. I was actually offended.

Every once in a while, former Cowboys player Michael Irving would come out and talk answer questions the audience would tweet him, but it was still such an unfulfilling experience. I told myself I would stay for another 45 minutes, then go home to sleep.

I eventually just started listening to my ESPN radio since they at least gave me information about what was happening behind the scenes. 

Watching the Draft is pretty tiring work. After a while, I became super hungry and just wanted to leave, but again, I told myself to stay just a little longer.

Around 7 p.m., an usher came to the front of my section and told us that food was here and we would be able to get free pizza, courtesy of the NFL. I jumped with excitement and rushed to the pizza area.

That Roger Goodell can't be too bad of a guy if he's giving us free pizza. Right?

Wrong. That Roger guy is a jerk. 

While eating my pizza, Roger came out to the stage for the next Draft pick announcement. As the crowd booed the commissioner, I asked the sleeping guy (who was now awake) why people hated Roger Goodell. 

Sleeping guy explained to me that Roger Goodell is the man that hides the abuse scandals in the NFL. If the scandals do come to the forefront, however, he gives players a slap on the wrist. 

How could a great guy that gives me free pizza be such an asshole? I booed. 

After two slices of pizza, and finding out that my Pizza Hero was actually the villain of the NFL, I decided to leave. Just as I packed up my belongings, I was given hope. 

A 10-year-old boy with a rare form of bone cancer was given the opportunity to announce the Seattle Seahawks' pick and the crowd stood to their feet, chanting the boy's name. Seahawks, Patriots and Eagles fans were cheering for a common cause.

I thought back on my rollercoaster of emotions and realized that there was a silver lining: there were fans from 32 different teams gathering under one roof, gathered for one common purpose — to encourage. The revelation of that in the end was the highlight of my night. It was a heartwarming feeling that I will never forget. 

And guess what! I found my umbrella sitting right outside of the exit as I left.

I also had another revelation that day: Dez caught it.