Why I Think Correcting Someone's Grammar Is The Worst Thing You Can Do
Just...don't do it, OK?
A new study confirms what we've all suspected: the grammar police are actually huge jerks.
The study came from The University of Michigan, and you can read all that mumbo jumbo yourself, where they use words much fancier than "jerk" and "giant buttholes," but that's basically the gist.
And listen, I get it, the urge can be very strong to correct someone's grammar. I've been there.
When you have an uncle who supports the Republican party because, "There ideas are so good!" or your mom, who thinks every single post on Facebook needs an ellipsis at the end...
It can be very hard to hold back. But I really urge you to exercise self-control.
Here's the thing. People who feel the need to correct your grammar all the time are THE WORST.
We get it Grammarly (and everyone who likes the Grammarly Facebook page), you think you're all smarter than us because of your high-brow spelling sensibilities.
You sound like Hermione in the first half of the first Harry Potter. Remember when no one liked her? That's who you are.
She was THE WORST at this point, then she starts hanging out with the cool kids and chills out a little.
Dropping into someone's Facebook status to remind them that they're missing a comma is like walking into someone's house and throwing paint on their walls.
Maybe it looks good to you, but you just ruined that person's wall because you weren't happy with it. Not cool.
Plus, it just gives you this terrible feeling in the pit of your stomach when your friend posts a long status about how excited they are about their new puppy and you jump in with the first comment to tell them that what they posted was a run on sentence, just like this sentence.
And listen, I'm not saying there aren't some egregious errors you're free to point out...
You're definitely free to call someone out when they're trying to call others out because they're asking for it.
But for the most part, your incessant editing is getting old.
Plus, most of the "rules" you're trying to enforce are outdated anyway. Grammar changes as language evolves. We can end sentences with prepositions now, split infinitives and refer to a person as they! (Also, notice how I didn't use the oxford comma there? DOWN WITH THE OXFORD COMMA!!!)
A good rule of thumb (especially on your Facebook feed) is let it go if you understand what the person is getting at. If it sounds like how people talk, it's probably OK.
And seriously, why are we trying to police the way everyone talks?
Everyone learns to speak differently and it's dependent on SO MANY factors. Do you know how many dialects there are in the United States alone? Me neither, because I tried to list them all and literally lost count. How are you going to tell someone the way they learned to speak from birth is wrong because it's not the way you learned? Not cool, yo.
Remember that phrase from grade school, "Ain't ain't a word cus ain't in the dictionary, so I ain't gonna say it?" Well that's B.S.
You know what IS in the dictionary? Crunk, Jeggings, Totes and Whatevs. If you're OK with saying crunk but not ain't, YOU'RE PART OF THE PROBLEM.
When in doubt, keep these wise words from Mara Wilson in mind.