Adult Coloring Books Are A Scam And It's Time We Talked About It
"I can't possibly finish my taxes without coloring a fairy garden first." - modern adults, apparently
You've seen adult coloring book displays in literally every store you've ever walked into.
This is not a drill. I actually spotted one in a gas station last month.
Your "cool" aunt probably gave you three for Christmas, which now sit unopened on your side table.
Because binge-watching "The West Wing" ultimately takes precedence.
Coloring books are the new version of a Target gift card: fairly cool, but really just a present that means you didn't know what else to get them.
And to be honest, I'd rather have a Target gift card at this point.
Anyway, thanks to aunts and other color-happy adults, coloring book sales increased twelve-fold from 2014 to 2015.
Out of Amazon's top 100 bestsellers, six are coloring books, which means coloring books are outselling all other printed literature 4 to 1.
Faber-Castell, one of the world's top colored pencil producers, reported a double-digit growth in sales last year, and dramatically ramped up production just to keep up with global demand.
And let's just talk about the INSANE variety for a second. Beyond just detailed nature scenes, there's Harry Potter, Grumpy Cat, and NSFW sex position coloring books on the market.
Proponents of the habit (who, by the way, literally meet in groups to color together), say they like it because it draws on childhood nostalgia and serves as an outlet for creative expression.
But most of all, everyone praises adult coloring because it's a stress reliever.
And while I'm happy to say many people using coloring therapy for treatment of mental illnesses and it works wonders for them, this sort of distraction shouldn't be necessary in the day-to-day life of the masses.
Is adult life today really so stressful that we have to resort to coloring mandalas to calm us down?
Do we really think this works? And more importantly, should we be giving sharp pencils to someone who's this upset?
GET THIS LADY A TRANQUIL GARDEN TO COLOR, STAT!
I'm here to tell you this is all nonsense, folks.
You're fooling yourself if you think coloring is going to make you feel better about your $35.12 bank account balance, or the fact that the guy you're seeing hasn't texted you back in four days.
