11 Phrases That Are So Dead, Now Even My Mom Uses Them

My mom, Kathy, is a newly-retired pediatrician who's constantly struggling to stay relevant. With each passing year, she clings harder to "hip" phrases to stay "edgy" and "relevant." Since she's entering a new phase in her life, I put together a list of all the phrases she should let fade into obscurity. Because, Mom, being hip isn't hip anymore—even the word "hip" gives me the ickys to say!

"YOLO" is over. I know this because my mom said it before taking a tequila shot provided by our waiter at an all-inclusive resort in Mexico. Now I know it can only be said "YOLO" with a cheeky sense of irony.

I'm looking directly at you, Mom. You are guilty of using this phrase even though Casey and I told you numerous times to abandon it after 2004 came to a close. Yet you've held on. It's time to retire "hurr did" and get a new hobby that doesn't include lightly embarrassing me in front of my adult friends.

Ohhh boy, Mom. I had no idea that this was over until you walked into the den and said that Dad's new Harley Davidson button-down was on fleek. Goodbye, "on fleek", you were bae before bae was bae.

That brings us to "bae." Even Jimmy Fallon agrees with this one. Ugh, this hurts. We love bae. Bae is bae and no one can bae as hard as bae can bae. But, Mom, it's over. Please find another nickname for Dad. Also, please stop calling kisses "smoochies." 

Much like Justin Bieber's innocence, "swag" is long gone from the lexicon of the hip and informed. I know this because Mom muttered this to herself when she was trying on Ralph Lauren dresses for my cousin's wedding last summer. LAST. SUMMER.

UGH! NO! Mark doesn't come over to "Netflix and chill." GROSS, MOM! We're adults and go out on dates. And I sincerely hope you and Dad don't Netflix and chill. Who taught you that phrase, anyway?!?

Ew! EW! NO! I don't want to know anymore. That phrase is ruined and done.

Anderson Cooper should know better, but I get why you didn't, Mom. Let me tell you now, though, that Casey and I want you to stop telling our high school friends that you're just going to "do me" when you run into them in our hometown. Please, for the love of YOUR CHILDREN...stop.

No, Mom, this party is most definitely NOT "off the hook." I don't even think baby showers can be rowdy. You're letting your mom show. :sigh:

Dad, Mom is drunk and quoting 1998 Justin Timberlake again!

Just because we don't like to eat leftover tuna casserole four nights in a row doesn't make us haters, Mom. It makes us your family, which now hates tuna casserole.

NO, MOM, NO ONE SAYS THAT. NOT SINCE 2011 HAS ANYONE SAID ANYTHING THAT QUALIFIES FOR THIS OUTDATED PHRASE. WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME?!