15 Hilarious Summaries Of The Books You Were Supposed to Read In School
Just because I was SUPPOSED to read it in high school doesn't mean I'm actually going to read it now.
1. "The Great Gatsby" by F. Scott Fitzgerald: Stupid rich people, drunk driving and then everyone suddenly feels like going back to the Midwest.
2. "Pride and Prejudice" by Jane Austen: Fun balls, sibling drama and Jane Austen flat out lies to you about men for 200 pages.
3. "Macbeth" by William Shakespeare: Ain't no party like a Macbeth party because a Macbeth party don't stop until the king is murdered, the best friend is murdered and everything is murdered.
4. "A Farewell to Arms" by Ernest Hemingway: Have you heard "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" by Green Day? Yeah, this book is basically that song but in World War One.
5. "The Picture of Dorian Gray" by Oscar Wild: GUYS, he's FOREVER 21. And also a raging masochistic asshole who destroys everything around him. Hooray?
6. "As I Lay Dying" by William Faulkner: This family is like an angry hillbilly "Real Housewives" franchise: they all have beef with each other and you never really find out why. Also, apparently when things don't go our way we BURN THE
7. "The Catcher in the Rye" by J.D. Salinger: Isn't it funny that you're supposed to read this in high school when it's a novel about a kid who intentionally gets kicked out of high school because he thinks it's stupid?
8. "A Midsummer Night's Dream" by William Shakespeare: Literally "Dawson's Creek plus magic and stuff.
9. "Anne of Green Gables" by L.M. Montgomery: All Anne wanted was PUFFY SLEEVES, Marilla! You couldn't give your poor orphan child who you're SO MEAN to a puffy sleeve for her troubles? SMH.
10. "Richard III" by William Shakespeare: Think Macbeth with less parties and magic. Additionally features creepy murdering uncles.
11. "Antigone" by Sophocles: EVERYONE DIES, and it's super complicated and you're not sure what you were supposed to 'get' out of it.
12. "Crime and Punishment" by Fyodor Dostoevsky: It was Raskolnikov! With the axe! In the hallway! This book is basically Clue but with more guilt and less winning.
13. "The Count of Monte Cristo" by Alexander Dumas: This is like "The Great Gatsby" except in turn-of-the-century Spain and he actually gets the girl (aka much, much better).
14. "The Call of the Wild by Jack London: I used to be a one-man wolf pack... and then my human died and I joined a real wolf pack.
