Starbucks is Back in the News and This Time With Something No One Would Turn Down

by N/A, 9 years ago | 2 min read

In what seems to be another brilliantly timed PR move by Starbucks to make customers forget just how much they hate Christmas, Starbucks is giving away free Starbucks For Life to lucky winners who can willingly turn the other cheek on the corporation's apparent war on Christmas. Yeah, I see exactly what's going on here: Starbucks thinks if they jack us up on free coffee and such for the rest of ever we'll forget the turmoil they put us through, but they can't fool me! Although, I just may enter.

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Some Starbucks cartoon character, the 'Thirsty Yeti,' is here to explain just how exactly you can win Starbucks For Life. Yeah, a cartoon character! Don't think that'll make us forget how much you hate the character known as Santa! …But, we're listening

Basically the way it shakes down (pun intended for this promotional shake down intended to steer us away from their Christmas hatred!) is:

• Pay for Starbucks using a My Starbucks Rewards card (that's one game play).
• Log in to StarbucksForLife.com
• Play a game once logged in, and find out instantly if you've won a prize–which could be Starbucks for a week, month, year or life

Seems pretty easy, right? Shall we cheers over some frappuccinos in honor of this glorious contest? YES!

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But, wait–hold on: have these delicious creations and potential promises of free access to them on an unlimited basis blinded us from what's really going on here? You know what I'm going to say (again). They still hate Christmas and free stuff doesn't change that, although it makes it a little easier to swallow; the information, not the beverage itself, which is already deliciously easy to swallow.

Back to the point I've yet to bring up, Starbucks For Life is an incredible opportunity to try and take advantage of corporate America in the best way possible: sucking money out them the way they have from us peasants for decades.

Sure, you'll need to dump a bunch of money into Starbucks in the following weeks hoping for the off chance you'll be one of the lucky winners among potentially 30 million sweepstakes entrants (that's how many entered last year), but if you do in fact win, you've won. You've won against blindingly rich corporate America and will never have to spend money in it again.

Now, that sounds like a cause worth celebrating! Beating a company like Starbucks (in a system they devised no less), though you still have to pretend that whole Christmas-hatred thing doesn't exist–if it ever really did.

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So, good luck to all of you who are interested in the Thirsty Yeti's pitch for Starbucks For Life. The odds are against you, and if you don't win, you've simply funded a company that is against Christmas, furthering its wealth. Is it a risk worth taking? That's up to you!