I Would Rather Shove Pencils In My Ears Than Listen To These 11 Awful Songs Again
We're coming up on a decade of time passed since the year 2006, and one thing we know to be true, is that you'll be glad these songs no longer inundate your lives. Remember when you couldn't turn on the radio or step into any sort of shopping mall or restaurant or whatever public venue it may have been without hearing these atrocities?! Good thing it's no longer these (rather whatever is blasting out of FM these days).
HAHAHA: Love how they "Beep" out little innuendos and naughty words, but surely everybody by the end of this song's run on the charts was ready to turn this (beep) off and tell the Pussycat Dolls and will.i.am to (beep) off! Right?! Thank goodness that's 10 years behind us.
Who knew we'd have to listen to "Who Knew" by P!nk for so long?! Who knew? No seriously, who knew?! We want to know who knew, because they should've given us a better warning to avoid any and all potential outlets for music, because this might be coming at us.
Oh snap! How come every time you (Fergie) come around my ears wanna shut down like (insert weird little rap thing she does)? Oh snap–this song was horrible.
The only good that came of this horrendous song is that Weird Al decided to mock it with his own parody called "White and Nerdy" which just so happens has 20 million more YouTube views than the original, and counting. We like to think that's some form of justice.
Bad puns aside, we were so sick of hearing this song by the end of 2006 and you can bet we've never revisited since, and especially not now–a decade later. If you're so sick of love songs, Ne-Yo, how about you quit writing them?!
If I lay here, will you promise to never put me in a time machine and transport me back to 2006 and have to listen to this song again?! Yes? Okay, thank you: I'll be laying here until the end of time just to be sure.
In addition to the annoyance of Akon's voice, we also we subject to over four minutes of misogynistic lyrics about "smackin' that" until "you get sore" in reference to a female's backside we assume. Hopefully we don't have to listen to anything this filthy, now 10 years later, but the jury is still out on that.
We literally couldn't escape this call for help from the S.O.S. of Rihanna, and we hope that 10 years later she's been able to find the answer to Y.O.U. are making this so hard, because we were (and still are) tired of hearing about it.
Do you like Starbucks–or any coffee shop that is? Do you like whimsical movies? Shopping at clothing and home décor stores? Just doing anything at all? Well, we hope in the time of 2006 while doing those things you also could stomach this song, (over and over) because it was everywhere.
Can we just say it? You know what we're going to say. Don't you? It's so obvious. This song...drove...us...CRAZY! I remember when, I remember when I lost my mind: it was when this song came out.
Do you like music? Do you like hearing all the music? How about all the music played over the top of each other on the same track? Then "Let's go!" and listen to this song somewhere, because that's all this atrocity in the music business was. The most pulsating three and half minutes that shouldn't ever have existed.
Well at least it (and all these other songs) and we all are no longer subject to hearing them against our wills any longer. Sayonara 2006–see you never.