$252 makes you Jimi F*cking Hendrix.
Hey you! Yes, you in the Sublime shirt. Are you tired of putting time into learning to play the guitar? Has your aimless noodling failed to turn you into Eddie Van Halen?
Well, fear not. Now there’s a gadget that lets you play the guitar without pesky things like “skill” and “practice.”
Introducing the “Chordelia”:
Here’s how it works:
- Simply attach it to any guitar that’s been gathering dust behind the Dave Matthews Band tees in your closet or attic:
2. Press down on the lever corresponding to the chord you want to play, and the device presses down on correct spots on the guitar strings.
3. Voilà! Without a lick of practice, you’re basically Jimi f***ing Hendrix.
The Chordelia plays five chords for you: A minor, G, D, C and E minor. These are some of the most common chords in popular music. They’d probably take an hour or two to master — but you’ve got naps to take, and jobs to not apply for, don’t you?
Yes. Yes, you do.
The Chordelia costs $252, which is probably more than you spent on your shitty First Act guitar. But considering you’ll never be able to play it otherwise, the Chordelia is a bargain!
Chordelia: Because learning is for suckers.