Are you an Ernest Hemingway or a Mr. Hyde?
We all have that friend who downs four vodka cranberries and won’t stop saying how much they love you—while your other friend fights with the bartender. Because alcohol makes us to lose our inhibitions, it also lowers our tendency to give a f*ck—but why do some of us behave differently?
Researchers from the University of Missouri at Columbia published a study that aimed to classify the different types of drunks, to better understand our behavior under the influence. The study involved 374 undergraduates who were categorized into four distinct groups, labeled by pop culture types: the Mary Poppins, the Ernest Hemingway, the Mr. Hyde and the Nutty Professor. So which one are you?
Mary Poppins, aka The Lovey-Dovey Drunk
This is the stranger you meet in the bar bathroom who touches your hair and tells you how beautiful you are. Mary Poppins drunks are typically major confidence-boosters: They’re outgoing people who get happier, sweeter and more touchy-feely with alcohol.
Ernest Hemingway, aka The Exactly The Same Drunk
40 percent of the study’s participants fell into a category aptly named after Ernest Hemingway, a famous writer who loved to brag he could “drink hells any amount of whiskey without getting drunk.”
The Hemingways exhibit the same personality traits as their sober selves, no matter how many Jägerbombs they’ve pounded.
Mr. Hyde, aka The Angry Drunk
This is the friend you hate getting drunk with because it always ends in a fight—whether it’s with you, a bartender or a trash can that’s “looking at him the wrong way.”
According to the study, the reckless Mr. Hydes become “particularly less responsible, less intellectual, and more hostile when under the influence of alcohol.”
Nutty Professor, aka The Chatty Drunk
The minute those champagne bubbles start kicking in, these “natural introverts” become social butterflies. They shed their inhibitions and become way more extroverted, chatting it up with strangers or anyone who will listen to their life story.
The authors of the study hope to use these classifications to provide tailored interventions geared towards those struggling with alcoholism. For now, you can use them to give your friends clever nicknames.